7.31.2006

End of Month Tally

Well, yesterday I had only 4 beers, and tonight only 2. I am at work now so I can safely say I won't be consuming anymore this evening. Its crazy, but I have no trouble going into work for an extra hour to get ahead, but if I have to work an extra hour because I am behind I really turn into a crabby bitch. Oh well, I guess that is a discussion for another time. On to the important stuff. Starting from the birth of this blog(the 21st) to today I have consumed approximately 56 alcoholic beverages. That's an average of 5.6 drinks an evening. Not too shabby. Medical professionals claim that 1-2 drinks a night are actually healthy for a person. Well, I am averaging almost triple that, so I guess I am three times as healthy as a non-drinker. So it is safe to assume that if this internet thingy stays popular, and the average male life span is 75yrs of age, I could be typing into this blog until I am 225 years old. Alcohol....The Fountain of youth.

7 comments:

Jess said...

In 200 years, you won't have to type any longer: Thoughts will automatically be sived from your brain into the computer.

But perhaps that would be a detriment for you. I was told in middle school science class that consuming alcohol kills brain cells, and at the rate your drinking, I doubt you'll have any of those little widgets left to produce any thoughts.

Jess said...

Oh dear, I discovered a glaring grammatical error while re-reading my posted comment. I meant "you're" not "your." Dammit!

In the future, the computer will automatically correct that error.

Ryan said...

I guess brain cells are precious to all of us, especially smart alecks. Besides, it’s the weak brain cells that get killed off first, so drinking is making me smarter as well as healthier. Let me check…yep, all contractions are correct.

Anonymous said...

Ahh, Beer! My one weakness...my Achilles Heel, if you will... (Homer Simpson)

Anonymous said...

Alright Brain, you don't like me, and I don't like you. But lets just do this, and I can get back to killing you with beer. (Homer Simpson)

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the secret to staying young. “A six pack a day keeps the wrinkles away”.

Anonymous said...

Too bad it doesnt work on your nuts.